Wednesday, September 14, 2005
its not wrong to miss capernwray…to wax poetic over hours of nothing spent under the stairs…to wish you had some shitty sheep field to play football in still…to wrack your brain trying to remember how many stairs the tower had…i could swear i knew at some point…one thing i really miss is someone else washing my sheets for me…that white delight of starchy cleanness always made up for the hassle of having to clean all the crap of my bed as quiet as possible because it was 11:00 pm and i had forgotten to put the new sheets on before my roommates went to sleep…again. remember trying to find a good private place to watch a movie? as term wore on and more places were needed…stable stadium seating (i was actually present when curtis had that brainwave)…dining rooms and bathrooms were employed…the laundry room was novel but noisy. the phone booths were safe after a certain time… persecution against Microsoft users…how much time did you spend waiting for the internet to start working again? did you ever throw one or two p coins at anyone out your window? did you ever get hit by one from my window? sorry. well, not really. how many secret crushes? did you ever have one on a lecturer? not even a little one? yeah right. derek burnside. ah. one year anniversary of term start is coming up...the 25th, for most of us (heidi, you late)...i went to england a week and a bit early, so that's the reason for this early anniversary entry. this year is going to be marked by such recollections… “oh…halloween again…i remember dressing up and going to dave and sadies and sue’s for treats”…one year anniversary. travel weekend. the first prayer day. (american) thanksgiving. one year anniversaries. do you remember what you did at capernwray on those days? first term flew by then, do you think its parallel will this year? life condensed. the beginning of term, when we were all born as people again because no one had known us before (mostly no one)…childhood and adolescence as we found our feet, changed, made connections…became confident in this new us…confident in our surroundings. we knew everything, it seemed. and at some point, God found us again, maybe again and again, and moved in with us…or moved away. he’s faithful. as dependable as italian bake on alternating thursdays. eventually, we were comfortable enough to be able to live there for the rest of our lives…perpetually stacking plates after a meal...we knew the routine…we knew when to go steal fruit and when to use the staff laundry room and what else canadian nickels we good for…we knew who gave the biggest scoops of ice cream in the beehive, and we knew the names of all the kitchen girls, and even where they were from. we had it all down pat. and that’s when we had to leave, and take it all with us. we still know all this stuff. It just doesn’t matter to anyone outside of the blogrings or the email, the occasional meet-ups, the reminisces. it is the past. it is a year ago. its never going to be again. its precious to us, but only to us. only to me.