the dark side

are we to live for others? how much? not all, certainly, i'm sure we are entitled to at least a couple hours a day to ourselves...a nap or reading a book or spacing out in the hammock. living for others...it's too draining, too extreme, god save us from extreme. even small choices tell us how sinful we are. the smallest thing...just like stars are tiny twinkling windows in the sky into an eternity of light, every second of our thoughts are tiny dark holes in our veneers of righteousness, tiny dark peepholes into the rotten core.